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i learned about money from my mother—how to be afraid of not having enough and how to stretch a dollar.
my mother had a clear-eyed focus on our family finances.
all i had to do was sweep the junk aside and allow her guidance to take over. just like in the photo of me at age 1, where she’s propping me up, hidden, behind the scenes.
tell me what your mom taught you about money and life.
b
i learned about money from my mother—how to be afraid of not having enough and how to stretch a dollar.
my mother had a clear-eyed focus on our family finances.
all i had to do was sweep the junk aside and allow her guidance to take over. just like in the photo of me at age 1, where she’s propping me up, hidden, behind the scenes.
tell me what your mom taught you about money and life.
i
i learned about money from my mother—how to be afraid of not having enough and how to stretch a dollar.
my mother had a clear-eyed focus on our family finances.
all i had to do was sweep the junk aside and allow her guidance to take over. just like in the photo of me at age 1, where she’s propping me up, hidden, behind the scenes.
tell me what your mom taught you about money and life.
em i learned about money from my mother—how to be afraid of not having enough and how to stretch a dollar.
my mother had a clear-eyed focus on our family finances.
all i had to do was sweep the junk aside and allow her guidance to take over. just like in the photo of me at age 1, where she’s propping me up, hidden, behind the scenes.
tell me what your mom taught you about money and life.
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romance your finances simplify, nurture, and spiritualize your money life with janet lombardi search main menu skip to primary content skip to secondary content home my story 7 steps to financial rebound money step two money step three money step four money step five money step six money step seven post navigation ← older posts thanksgiving. a time for giving thanks, right? posted on november 24, 2016 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com reply “gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. it turns what we have into enough and more. it turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. it can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.” codependent no more, melody beattie must there always be gratitude? i say yes, especially at thanksgiving, an american holiday. in fact, i have a ceramic plaque in my kitchen that says “there is always, always, always something to be grateful for.” i bought it at a chicago street fair during a time i needed the reminder to count my blessings. those were some dark days as i was on the verge of going under financially and enduring the shame of my husband’s impending prison stay. it affected me that so i wrote bankruptcy: a love story! these days, we could certainly argue that with such a contentious post-presidential election and deep, deep divide–that we have little to be grateful for. but no. there’s plenty– a country where we own the power of the vote, where we are free to express what we feel, where we can assemble peacefully. i’m aware that some people won’t agree or have ever felt the rights i just named, but everyone needs to name his or her own gratitude. an acquaintance told me recently she was writing a “100 things to be grateful for every day.” wow! can you really find 100 things a day? she said yes, starting with the hot cup of coffee she enjoys every morning. gratitude is in the attitude. that’s not placating or trite. it’s true. if i find myself grousing a little too much, even to myself, i know it’s time for a gratitude list. it’s amazing how my perspective shifts. what are you grateful for? share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | tagged thanksgiving; gratitude; grateful | leave a reply is there a retirement crisis for women? posted on november 3, 2015 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com reply sallie krawcheck, one of the most senior women on wall street and now owner and chair of ellevate, a global professional women’s network, thinks so.                       in her rather brilliant article, “how the gender wage gap makes the retirement savings crisis worse,” krawcheck talks about the gender wage and “gender investing” gaps as being at the heart of the crisis. bottom line: women not having enough money to live comfortably towards the end of their lives. ever worry about this? i have and bet you do too. i encourage you to read the whole article but here’s my takeaway: it’s not about financial and investment education for women, marketing, or leaving investment decisions up to men, says krawcheck. it requires what she terms a “research-driven rethink” about women and investment. in other words, real evidence showing us what women need and the changes required. let’s back away from the assumptions and lobby for change based on what’s real. we’re not getting any younger, right? like most money matters, let’s open our eyes even if we’re afraid and learn. the gap in retirement savings affects all of us as a society and the sooner we address it the sooner we can sleep nights. do you worry about living comfortably in retirement, my friends? share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | tagged gender wage gap, investing, personal finance, retirement, sallie krawcheck | leave a reply bankruptcy: a love story & me on the radio! posted on june 4, 2015 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com reply what a day! tippy felzen stein, the lovely host of tippy talk, “books i love,” on blog talk radio, interviewed me today. tippy, an author herself and lover of all things book, and i spoke about the events in my memoir-in-progress, bankruptcy: a love story, as well as the process of writing. it’s a personal look and fascinating preview of the story. thank you, tippy, for the wonderful opportunity. i’d recommend you all to follow tippy on blog radio! listen here: bankruptcy: a love story with janet lombardi. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | tagged bankruptcy: a love story; personal finance; money; books; money management; memoir | leave a reply what’s your money personality? posted on may 1, 2015 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com reply are you a saver, spender, hybrid? check out this fun quiz to find out! http://www.dailyfinance.com/2015/04/30/which-of-these-5-money-personality-types-are-you/ knowing your type is a great idea because: awareness and good money management go hand-in-hand.  clarity around your dollars translates into less frivolous spending. you can gain insight into your love relationship. a saver and a spender don’t have to clash. in fact, saver/spender combos can be a perfect pair—finance-wise! you can adjust your behavior if you don’t like your profile. save 10%, straight out of your paycheck, if you know money burns a hole in your pocket. you can learn that your way isn’t the only way.  financial types have a lot to learn from each other. what kind of money-type are you? i’d love to know. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | leave a reply are we responsible for family members? posted on february 21, 2015 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com reply yesterday, i had the great pleasure of appearing on a huffington post live web session dealing with the topic of family members who’ve “made mistakes.” a producer contacted me after reading my essay on salon.com. introduced by the current story of allison williams dealing with dad brian williams’ suspension from nbc news after admitting he fabricated a story in 2003, the session featured four panelists, including me, who’ve confronted family members’ destructive behavior and the effects on us.  it was surprising how many positive things the panel had to say. view the segment here:  http://huff.lv/17grxlf. i enjoyed it so much! it gave me an opportunity to talk about my experience of living with a husband who committed a white-collar crime, the emotional upheaval, my acceptance of him and the circumstances, and the eventual crawl from the wreckage to a renewed life.  it also gave me a chance to mention my book, bankruptcy: a love story, of which i’m finishing the rewrite. i can’t wait to launch it! i appreciated the panel conversation, also, because so often no one wants to discuss these topics but, as us panelists showed, exploration of these deep emotional experiences can be truly enriching. hey, you never know what will feed your wisdom and serenity.  i’m ever grateful. i’d love to hear about your challenging moments.  leave a comment. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | leave a reply money a la the jetsons posted on september 12, 2014 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com 1 yesterday, on the heels of apple’s launch of the iphone 6 and smartwatch, the new york times elevated the “digital wallet” as the most important feature of those two pieces of hardware. really? the article, “the digital wallet revolution,” by edward castronova and joshua a.t. fairfield, described the digital wallet as “allowing users to eschew cash and credit cards for a quick swipe of their device at the register.”  as so many commenters attested, the concept of a digital wallet is not new. this digital wallet could, according to the authors, aggregate retail points and other perks, bringing all the currencies together. and that would be fine. i’m all for new technology—i’m blogging, after all. but what we all need is simplicity, not more complex methods of keeping track. simplicity—what money is coming in? what’s going out? how much can i spend on my favorite things… after all the bills are paid, i’ve been prudent about saving, and am not spending beyond my means?  there are digital apps for managing this kind of spending. keeping our eyes on our money is so key to a healthy money relationship. being aware of where the dollars are going is the only way to end up with some in hand. it doesn’t take a digital wallet. we don’t need more complex methods, we need to simplify and nurture our money lives. how do you keep track? share it here. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | 1 reply why a personal finance blog? posted on july 1, 2014 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com 1 “why write about money?” friends have asked. since rebounding from a major financial knockout, i find the how’s and why’s of personal finance fascinating. other people must agree as this photo of a bumper sticker, “you can’t have any finance w/o romance,” was snapped by my son on a california highway. plus, i wish i had had romance your finances when i was in the thick of my money crisis. i wish i had had the trusted friend who could’ve taken me by the hand and shown me how to get my life back. if you’ve read my story, you know my money life crashed and burned spectacularly. it makes for a fascinating read so stay tuned for my memoir, bankruptcy: a love story. well before we were in crisis, my husband and i went to a debt consolidation company.  i walked through that office crying out for help, like a suicide victim. i wanted those folks to show me how to manage day-to-day. not investment advice, for which financial planners a-plenty will welcome you. but someone willing to show me how to live within my means and make a spending plan work. at the end of our meeting, the nice debt consolidation folks said we were in good shape because we were making our payments. they claimed we didn’t any help. after that, things nose-dived. my husband continued to debt and ended up further in the hole. so romance your finances is my attempt to bring readers back to personal money basics—to give back. so many people helped me. being healthy around money, which includes having a spiritual, nurturing attitude towards our dollars and ourselves can be achieved by anyone. but you need to be willing to look at your numbers and make courageous changes in your habits. you don’t have to be a math genius to have a sane money life. you just need to know how to add and subtract.  and if you’re struggling with debt, i urge you to try debtor’s anonymous. so let’s get back to basics. let’s breach the personal finance taboo and start talking about our money lives. and abundance and prosperity will find you. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | tagged home finance, money, money basics, money management, personal finance | 1 reply subprime mortgages ready for another whirl? posted on june 29, 2014 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com 1 just when the u.s. economy is getting back on its feet, so are subprime mortgages. as reported in today’s times (“in home loans, subprime fades as a dirty word”) these once-sketchy loans are being offered to those who might not otherwise qualify for a traditional mortgage. my husband and i took out a subprime mortgage in 2005. it resulted in the loss of our home. so, buyer beware. (read my story for a glimpse. better yet, wait for my book, bankruptcy: a love story, in rewrite.) if you don’t know what a subprime mortgage is, the times definition is helpful: traditionally, any loan to someone with a credit score below about 640 (the highest possible score is 850) has been considered subprime. during the housing bubble, when lenders were hungry for loans to package into securities for resale, the subprime label expanded to describe all manner of schemes, including loans with low or no down payments, “liar loans” with no proof of income and loans with a monthly payment so low that the principal actually increased over time. i’m blogging about this today because knowledge is king (or queen). if you’re shopping for a mortgage, know what you’re signing onto. these new subprimes, which only represent a tiny portion of the market today, extract interest rates that top double digits. talk, share, know. we’re responsible for our own money lives. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | 1 reply make gratitude work for you posted on june 14, 2014 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com 2 “gratitude is a tool,” i heard someone say the other night when we were talking about money. hearing that gave me pause.  i’ve been so used to hearing the platitudes about gratitude—how important it is to be grateful as a means of appreciation and positive energy that i hadn’t really thought about gratitude as having a purpose. but gratitude does have a purpose. gratitude has saved me. for example, whenever i start to feel sorry for myself—for whatever reason—loss, not getting what i want, disappointment, a down day, i have a tool: i can write a gratitude list: a roof over my head delicious, nutritious food a good job my health delightful, kind children loving family a sense of humor when i look at my list, i feel wealthy.  and it makes me just want to say thank you. my gratitude list helps me put my needs in perspective and has the side effect of strengthening my connection with my higher power and other people. i feel more loving and compassionate when i am grateful i believe you can be grateful for just about everything. so often the thing we are dreading or think we’re going to hate becomes a blessing in disguise. to see the breadth of things to be thankful for, read the wonderful poem, thanks, by w. s. merwin, one of my favorite poets. yes, gratitude is an attitude but it is also a tool. so let’s put it to work. please share your thoughts about gratitude. we’ll all be grateful. and if you enjoyed this post, please share it! share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | 2 replies my mother, my money guru posted on may 10, 2014 by janet.lombardi9@gmail.com 6 as a girl, i watched my mother, anna, pay bills at our kitchen table. the vinyl tablecloth, a neat stack of bills with their envelopes and stamps nearby and a pile of money orders she’d sign in her neat, flowery penmanship. i learned about money from my mother—how to be afraid of not having enough and how to stretch a dollar. once i heard a commercial jingle for hfc finance, a well-known lending company at the time, on the radio, its song punctuating the company name with the strikes of a xylophone. i said to my mom, “why don’t you call them, mom, they’re giving away money.” she laughed. “they don’t give you money for nothing,” she said. when my parents bought our house in brooklyn, a big deal for my depression-era folks, she went to work nights at a candy factory to help pay the mortgage. “i told your father,” she said, “how else are we going to pay our bills if i don’t go to work?” and my father told me later when i was an adult, “if it wasn’t for your mother, we’d have nothing. i would’ve spent it all.” my mother had a clear-eyed focus on our family finances. my mother was an exceptional role model when it came to money and so many other things. whether i chose to absorb those lessons was another matter. in fact, i discarded her simple “don’t spend more than you have” approach in place of a freewheeling “ain’t no stopping me from having what i want” recklessness. but eventually, when the ice water was thrown in my intent-on-denial face, my mother’s common sense rallied to my side like a long-lost friend. the foundation my mom had laid was there under all the debris. all i had to do was sweep the junk aside and allow her guidance to take over. just like in the photo of me at age 1, where she’s propping me up, hidden, behind the scenes. though my mom has been gone for almost 15 years now, she left a legacy of care. her lessons of strength and common sense had been there for me all along. i just needed to listen to my still, small voice inside me right alongside hers. tell me what your mom taught you about money and life. share this:sharefacebooktwitteremailprintlinkedin posted in uncategorized | tagged money; mother; mother's day; family finances | 6 replies post navigation ← older posts janet lombardi subscribe to romance your finances via email enter your email address to subscribe to this blog and receive notifications of new posts by email. join 29 other subscribers email address search follow me on twittermy tweets recent posts thanksgiving. a time for giving thanks, right? is there a retirement crisis for women? bankruptcy: a love story & me on the radio! 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